Comments on: Marriage Communication and The Top Five Reasons to Get Marriage Counseling http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling In Relationship Communication, Cooperation Is The Foundation Of Everything.... Thu, 05 Jan 2012 03:53:24 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Paulette M http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2607 Paulette M Wed, 09 Sep 2009 08:02:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2607 I Know that it hurts but I'm going to speak some hard truths to you,it sounds to me that you where just his meal ticket,this girlfriend that he all of a sudden has, he has probably had all along. For him to treat you so coldly says a lot about how he really feels about you and has probably felt this way all along.Hurt always has to run it's course. But what you need to do is pull yourself up - dust yourself off - and look at this as a learning experience,give yourself some time and find you because it sounds like you gave more than you got.Get out with your friends have some fun get over him and move on. <br><b>References : </b><br> I Know that it hurts but I’m going to speak some hard truths to you,it sounds to me that you where just his meal ticket,this girlfriend that he all of a sudden has, he has probably had all along. For him to treat you so coldly says a lot about how he really feels about you and has probably felt this way all along.Hurt always has to run it’s course. But what you need to do is pull yourself up – dust yourself off – and look at this as a learning experience,give yourself some time and find you because it sounds like you gave more than you got.Get out with your friends have some fun get over him and move on.
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]]> By: 00silky http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2606 00silky Wed, 09 Sep 2009 08:00:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2606 Look here boo...."different name, same old game". He got an education and now his confidence is through the roof. I know it hurts but God did you a favor, most likely this other woman you speak of is one of his colleagues. You have just been given a freedom most women would die for when married to someone they regret ever marrying. I know you miss him but that's only because you're just use to him. If you can recall there was no love between you two when all the problems started to get real bad anyway. So don't sweat the "la la," take this opportunity to give your own life an upgrade (i.e: workout, go back to school yourself). If you wonder why he's calling you all the time, it's because he probably feels guilty for the way he treated you. If you really don't want to talk too him anymore just don't answer his calls. Take some time out and take care of yourself. Start by going to the movies by yourself, it's really fun because you actually get to see the movie and not feel obligated to do anything for someone else. Yeah, that James Bond movie comes out tomorrow "Quantum of Solace" go see that by yourself as therapy. it'll make you feel better....Trust me! Eventually, he'll fall out with the new woman because, he won't be everything she dreamed of either. So I want to tell you congratulations you just passed on your headache to another woman and now I know you feel 100% better. You need to stop thinking about him and start minding your own business. It's the only way you'll move on. If you have to fight that much just to stay married to someone, then it's not worth it ( of course I could be speaking for myself when I say that). L.I.G: Let It Go, don't look back, understand that this wasn't meant to be. Stop trippin and Keep it Pimp'n......Good luck!<br><b>References : </b><br> Look here boo…."different name, same old game". He got an education and now his confidence is through the roof. I know it hurts but God did you a favor, most likely this other woman you speak of is one of his colleagues. You have just been given a freedom most women would die for when married to someone they regret ever marrying. I know you miss him but that’s only because you’re just use to him. If you can recall there was no love between you two when all the problems started to get real bad anyway.

So don’t sweat the "la la," take this opportunity to give your own life an upgrade (i.e: workout, go back to school yourself). If you wonder why he’s calling you all the time, it’s because he probably feels guilty for the way he treated you. If you really don’t want to talk too him anymore just don’t answer his calls. Take some time out and take care of yourself. Start by going to the movies by yourself, it’s really fun because you actually get to see the movie and not feel obligated to do anything for someone else. Yeah, that James Bond movie comes out tomorrow "Quantum of Solace" go see that by yourself as therapy. it’ll make you feel better….Trust me!

Eventually, he’ll fall out with the new woman because, he won’t be everything she dreamed of either. So I want to tell you congratulations you just passed on your headache to another woman and now I know you feel 100% better.

You need to stop thinking about him and start minding your own business. It’s the only way you’ll move on. If you have to fight that much just to stay married to someone, then it’s not worth it ( of course I could be speaking for myself when I say that). L.I.G: Let It Go, don’t look back, understand that this wasn’t meant to be.

Stop trippin and Keep it Pimp’n……Good luck!
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]]> By: mindy_rawls http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2605 mindy_rawls Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:58:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2605 When you forgive, for whatever reason you have to. That is when you will wake up move on and do for you what only you can do for yourself. No one will treat you better than you. The feelings may be more out of "habit" or the fact you feel obligated to feel some kind of way about a man you pledged to spend your life with. <br><b>References : </b><br> When you forgive, for whatever reason you have to. That is when you will wake up move on and do for you what only you can do for yourself. No one will treat you better than you. The feelings may be more out of "habit" or the fact you feel obligated to feel some kind of way about a man you pledged to spend your life with.
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]]> By: jude http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2604 jude Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:56:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2604 my ex did the same thing to me, and believe me he already knew this other woman. it will hurt to see him treat her like gold when he didn't treat u that good. it took years to get over the hurt. then one day an old friend told me he and his new love were not doing well, that there was allot of fighting, so he did not in the end treat her any better than he had me. his family even turned on me the minute she came into his life. this was a 10 year marriage, he trashed my heart, name called, did everything he could do to hurt me. my future held only good, i remarried, and all is well. i wondered why my ex had tried to find me, now i know, all wasn't wonderful in paradise anymore. u won't feel better until u quit taking the blame for his mistakes.<br><b>References : </b><br> my ex did the same thing to me, and believe me he already knew this other woman. it will hurt to see him treat her like gold when he didn’t treat u that good. it took years to get over the hurt. then one day an old friend told me he and his new love were not doing well, that there was allot of fighting, so he did not in the end treat her any better than he had me. his family even turned on me the minute she came into his life. this was a 10 year marriage, he trashed my heart, name called, did everything he could do to hurt me. my future held only good, i remarried, and all is well. i wondered why my ex had tried to find me, now i know, all wasn’t wonderful in paradise anymore. u won’t feel better until u quit taking the blame for his mistakes.
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]]> By: texaswildman http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2603 texaswildman Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:54:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2603 it's time to hit the trail darling. not everything that shines is gold. you will get over it. and you will find or will be found by some one that's being there and done that. trust in god. and he will guide him right over. so wait for the call.<br><b>References : </b><br> it’s time to hit the trail darling. not everything that shines is gold. you will get over it. and you will find or will be found by some one that’s being there and done that. trust in god. and he will guide him right over. so wait for the call.
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]]> By: Gourmet Flossie http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2602 Gourmet Flossie Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:52:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2602 I think it sounds as though there was more going on than the emotional affair, Im not saying that he was cheating but I really do believe he was using you to get where he is now- and I think its him that drove you to "be demmanding etc" and hes just using that as an excuse. Im sorry to say it but you hit the nail on the head when you said he said he may come back to you if you kiss his a** etc - someome who truly loves you does not demmand or even suggest that. At the moment my guess is that your hurt is self inflicted and trying to work out what went wrong...once you get past that stage you will hopefully realise that you are much better off without him and that you dont need him ;)<br><b>References : </b><br> I think it sounds as though there was more going on than the emotional affair, Im not saying that he was cheating but I really do believe he was using you to get where he is now- and I think its him that drove you to "be demmanding etc" and hes just using that as an excuse. Im sorry to say it but you hit the nail on the head when you said he said he may come back to you if you kiss his a** etc – someome who truly loves you does not demmand or even suggest that.
At the moment my guess is that your hurt is self inflicted and trying to work out what went wrong…once you get past that stage you will hopefully realise that you are much better off without him and that you dont need him ;)
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]]> By: drumnjay23 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2601 drumnjay23 Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:50:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2601 way too long but I know what you are feeling like. trust me. but there is no set time of when u will get over your ex. I am divorced too and my ex wife cheated on me and it has been 2 months and I am still going crazy over her. I hate her but i love her ya know. just gotta give it time. find yourself before u try finding someone else....wow that sounded good, i should start like a halmark card or something with that phrase! sorry but its so true. Find Your self Before you find someone else. <br><b>References : </b><br> way too long but I know what you are feeling like. trust me. but there is no set time of when u will get over your ex. I am divorced too and my ex wife cheated on me and it has been 2 months and I am still going crazy over her. I hate her but i love her ya know. just gotta give it time. find yourself before u try finding someone else….wow that sounded good, i should start like a halmark card or something with that phrase! sorry but its so true. Find Your self Before you find someone else.
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]]> By: im2ez4u http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2600 im2ez4u Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:48:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2600 It'll end when you decide that you're better off now than when he was there.<br><b>References : </b><br> It’ll end when you decide that you’re better off now than when he was there.
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]]> By: Tara http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2599 Tara Wed, 09 Sep 2009 07:46:59 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2599 Yeahh that movie was great- I wish I could do that for several relationships as well.. Well, all I know is in any relationship there is always one person that tolerates more, one person that loves MORE. And you're the one that loves him more than he loves you, in this relationship= and i'm sorry- I've been there, and it won't stop hurting until you find a person that can love you the way you need to be cherished and cared about. Don't worry, this too will pass--my mom always says, and it does...<br><b>References : </b><br> Yeahh that movie was great- I wish I could do that for several relationships as well..
Well, all I know is in any relationship there is always one person that tolerates more, one person that loves MORE. And you’re the one that loves him more than he loves you, in this relationship= and i’m sorry- I’ve been there, and it won’t stop hurting until you find a person that can love you the way you need to be cherished and cared about. Don’t worry, this too will pass–my mom always says, and it does…
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]]> By: Anne L http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/marriage-communication-and-the-top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling/comment-page-1#comment-2598 Anne L Wed, 09 Sep 2009 02:44:25 +0000 http://www.relationship-communication.net/marriage-communication/top-five-reasons-to-get-marriage-counseling-4#comment-2598 <b>It's been five months since we separated. I filed for divorce in the fall. When am I going to stop being sad?</b><br>I miss my ex. I do. Our relationship had deteriorated for many reasons, but mostly because of his lying and my being so demanding of him and myself. It's like I pushed my overachieving onto him and I see that now. But he lied about so many things, including talking with his ex, having emotional affairs, dating other women (he says no sex and I choose to believe that). He told his family every horrible thing about me he could so naturally they hate me. And my head was in the clouds the whole time, I guess. So I asked for marriage counseling, which he kept putting off over and over again. I guess I know why now. One day he told me it was over. I came home from work to find him all packed up and moving out. I was devastated and hysterical. I literally wanted to die. He said that he just can't take living with me anymore. He said that he knew he hadn't communicated any of this with me and that's just because he doesn't communicate...like that's fine. So he left. And when he did, he found a girlfriend a few days later. I don't understand. Of course, he denies it - but she lives with him, she writes him love letters that he leaves out for anyone to see, they text each other about sex and stuff...oh, and he took her as his date to his sister's wedding that was out of state and took place ONE WEEK after I filed for divorce. WTF? Not only that, but they had to fly to get there...he never took me anywhere that I didn't have to pay my own way...he said she paid her own way...whatever, it still sucks, included her in family pictures and everything. You have no idea how much this hurts. I cry every day. I feel like my life has been robbed from me. Oh, and this is just on the cusp of him finishing his Ph.D. in physics. I worked full-time to support us while he went to school. I feel so hurt, so betrayed, so discarded. This is some real pain here. I didn't have a hard life until this point, so I guess I'm not used to it. But why do I still answer the phone when he calls? It's like I'm desperate to hear from him. Why do I hope he'll change his mind and come back to me and agree to marriage counseling? Why do I hope this is all just a bad dream or a misunderstanding? I love him. He's my husband and I miss him. I'm so sad. Why don't I matter to him? I only filed for divorce because I had no choice. I still feel that way. He left me high and dry and told me that if I "kiss his ass", he may come around when and if he feels like it. I'm his WIFE, not a whore mistress ho slut. After all the hurt, lies and betrayal, I still love and miss him. What is wrong with me? And when is this going to stop hurting? I think about it all the time. I wish I could erase him from my memory like that Eternal Sunshine movie. :( :( :( It’s been five months since we separated. I filed for divorce in the fall. When am I going to stop being sad?
I miss my ex. I do. Our relationship had deteriorated for many reasons, but mostly because of his lying and my being so demanding of him and myself. It’s like I pushed my overachieving onto him and I see that now. But he lied about so many things, including talking with his ex, having emotional affairs, dating other women (he says no sex and I choose to believe that). He told his family every horrible thing about me he could so naturally they hate me. And my head was in the clouds the whole time, I guess. So I asked for marriage counseling, which he kept putting off over and over again. I guess I know why now.

One day he told me it was over. I came home from work to find him all packed up and moving out. I was devastated and hysterical. I literally wanted to die. He said that he just can’t take living with me anymore. He said that he knew he hadn’t communicated any of this with me and that’s just because he doesn’t communicate…like that’s fine. So he left. And when he did, he found a girlfriend a few days later. I don’t understand. Of course, he denies it – but she lives with him, she writes him love letters that he leaves out for anyone to see, they text each other about sex and stuff…oh, and he took her as his date to his sister’s wedding that was out of state and took place ONE WEEK after I filed for divorce. WTF? Not only that, but they had to fly to get there…he never took me anywhere that I didn’t have to pay my own way…he said she paid her own way…whatever, it still sucks, included her in family pictures and everything. You have no idea how much this hurts. I cry every day. I feel like my life has been robbed from me.

Oh, and this is just on the cusp of him finishing his Ph.D. in physics. I worked full-time to support us while he went to school. I feel so hurt, so betrayed, so discarded. This is some real pain here. I didn’t have a hard life until this point, so I guess I’m not used to it.

But why do I still answer the phone when he calls? It’s like I’m desperate to hear from him. Why do I hope he’ll change his mind and come back to me and agree to marriage counseling? Why do I hope this is all just a bad dream or a misunderstanding? I love him. He’s my husband and I miss him. I’m so sad. Why don’t I matter to him?

I only filed for divorce because I had no choice. I still feel that way. He left me high and dry and told me that if I "kiss his ass", he may come around when and if he feels like it. I’m his WIFE, not a whore mistress ho slut.

After all the hurt, lies and betrayal, I still love and miss him. What is wrong with me?

And when is this going to stop hurting? I think about it all the time. I wish I could erase him from my memory like that Eternal Sunshine movie. :( :( :(

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